www.travisclay.org

Over the past few years I have become more politically active. Politics interests me because it eventually affects our everyday life. We are told what we can and cannot do by people who represent us. That is why I think it is very important to be armed with knowledge when you go to the voting booth. In the next few months I hope to transform this site into a place where people will be able to view local candidates and their voting records.

I will do my best to keep my personal opinions out of this part of the blog. I will not promote any candidate. I will only provide factual information.

If you have a suggestion for the site, feel free to let me know.

Travis Clay

This morning Amy sent me the following link: http://whenhellomeansgoodbye.blogspot.com/2009/10/wordless-wednesday.html

During a recent conversation, I mentioned that I could not wait to have a kid so I could put them in a pumpkin. I guess I just think it would be funny and cool at the same time. You have to admit, it makes a great photo op.

Since I’m me, I started poking around the site to see what it was about. Went to the first post and barely made it through it because I began to uncontrolably cry. As tears streamed down my face, I got up and closed my office door. I probably cried a full 8 to 10 minutes. Thankfully I am getting over a cold so my stuffy nose hides my tears.

What hit me the hardest was the realization that I would be a daddy today. Amy was due in Sept., but reading through the posts really brought up feelings I haven’t felt in a while.

Since I never linked to Amy’s post about what happened, I figure now would be as good a time as ever.

http://yetuc.blogspot.com/2009/01/news.html

Travis Clay

I’m going to assume I’m kicking an ant hill on this one. I should know better, but I would like to share my personal views on gay marriage.

My take on the gay marriage thing is in a fluid state. It has gone from a completely “NO NO NO” to more of a “I don’t agree with them on the issue” and probably somewhere else tomorrow.
 
I can’t justify my views on gay marriage unless I explain my religious views on homosexuality.
 
I am a Christian and that tints my view on life and the world. I believe in the teachings of Christ and his disciples. I view them not only as solid “advice”, but as truths. Right vs Wrong. Good vs Evil. So, I cannot begin discussing the issue of gay marriage without stating that fact.
 
Secondly, I don’t believe nature intended for homosexuality to be the norm. In a clearly scientific viewpoint, it is not the natural sexual state or tendency of most, if any creature on earth. The main purpose of sex is for reproduction and homosexuality does not accomplish that. (A friend mentioned that it may be an evolutionary caused population control method. It is an interesting theory.)
 
Back to my Christian approach on things for a moment. As mentioned before, I believe there are rights and wrongs in this world. And the wrongs can mostly be labeled as “sins”. Sins ranges from lying to murder. I think the thing that people misunderstand about what a Christian’s view (SHOULD BE) on sin is that sins are equal in the eyes of God. We humans place various penalties and judgments on “evil” or “wrong” actions. God does not. Any sin brings the same ultimate consequence of living eternally away from God’s presence. Since I believe that is God’s view on sin based on the Bible, I try to keep it mine as well. In the realm of laws and legal issues around the world, I recognize the various degrees of punishment placed on criminal actions by societies. In most cases they are just. Thankfully, acts of homosexuality do not (and should not) be labeled as criminal acts in our criminal justice system.

You may have heard the term “Hate the sin, not the sinner.” It is an overused phrase in some religious areas, but I feel it holds water here. If someone lies, do I hate them? No. If someone kills, do I hate them? It becomes more difficult (especially when it directly effects me), but no. If two people of the same sex are intimate in the privacy of their own home, do I hate them? Nope. I just think the above actions go against my personal beliefs and values. I disagree with the action but love the person. As my mom always said, “the church is full of sinners.” 

And now my views on gay marriage.
 
Traditionally, marriage is a religious institution. Though history teaches us that in many societies cohabitation occurred, the monogamous form of marriage that is practiced today was founded in religious teachings and traditions. This is where the current conflict begins.
 
Everywhere you go today, you hear people screaming “Separation of Church and State!” But those screams are only heard when that statement is convenient to the person declaring it. (And we won’t discuss the fact that the statement or declaration cannot be found in any of our founding documents.) But tolerance is a two way street. Since idea of marriage in the U.S. is a religious based institution, perhaps it is time to make a move on that separation thing. Because that is really where the major issue lies; the fact that the religious crowd does not want to redefine the meaning and term “marriage” and the other side wants the benefits and recognition that comes with marriage. In those states where civil unions do give couples the same rights given to married couples, this has still not settled this debate. For the gay community, it is about equality. I also believe it is about getting a governmental institution to justify and accept of their lifestyle.
 
And I can understand their point of view.
 
So my opinion is that the State and Federal Governments need to get out of the business of overseeing, instituting and regulating “marriage”. If they want to continue to use some kind of classification to create laws, divide property and implement tax codes, perhaps they should turn more toward “civil unions” (or whatever you choose to call it) for all; including those who are “religious”. This would eliminate the need for state issued marriage certificates while giving people the ability to have the same benefits as those who were previously considered “married”.
 
Allow people who want to be “married” to do so in their own churches or religious events. Allow those religious organizations decide what marriage should be. This gives people the option as to how they define marriage and, as with most religions, allows people to worship in places that share their beliefs. I may not agree on how religious institutions define marriage, but it at least allows me to decide what and how I worship. This also allows the “religious” to hold on to something they hold dear, while allowing others to have the same benefits and rights as what was previously known as marriage.
 
To me, this is a sensible resolution to the current debate within the State and Federal governments. There are kinks that will need to be addressed, but this hopefully would end this extremely divisive issue and allow Americans to argue over something else; because they will.
 
Each side can and must be willing to compromise. It is my hope that my home state of Alabama will pick up this idea up and run with it. I think it would be great if a Southern state championed and implemented this type of Libertarian idea.

Travis Clay

War is bad.

In a Utopian society war would not exist and we would all live at peace with each other. Unfortunately, we do not live in an Utopian society. We never will. In fact, being involved in war is necessary at times. The American Revolution, World War 1 and World War 2 are just a few examples.

But there are those that sit on their moral high horse and condemn those who have/had to make very tough decisions on how to keep the American people safe. These decisions are not always the right or the most popular ones, but they have to be made.

Jon Stewart’s answer in the following video is naive and just plain ignorant to the realities that the Allies were facing when fighting Japan. As mentioned in the video, it is easy to spout off one’s (almost Holier than Thou) views on an issue that happened 64 years ago if you do not truly understand and see the whole picture. Mr. Stewart even paused when giving his answer, yet still came to the conclusion that Truman is a war criminal for using atomic bombs on Japan.

I shall now let the video speak for itself.

Jon Stewart, War Criminals & The True Story of the Atomic Bombs

It may be difficult to watch, but please stick with it. If you hold views similar to Jon Stewart regarding our use of atomic weapons during WW2, I hope this video gives you a better understanding of the brutal realities of the War we were fighting. Perhaps it will change your view on current and future wars that we will fight.

Travis Clay

January 2nd was one of the happiest days of my life. Other than being my wife’s birthday, it was also the day that we found out she was pregnant.

Getting to that point wasn’t easy. For almost three years we had no luck at all. Since things were not progressing, we started getting tested, taking pills, using shots and other embarrassingly invasive procedures. I’ll spare you the details, but let’s just say that I’m glad I am not Roman Catholic.

From the moment the line appeared on the pregnancy test, we started talking about the future and the changes that would have to be made. We talked names, day care and other things in which we needed to prepare.

After visiting the doctor to confirm the line was real and we were not just imagining it, we scheduled our first ultrasound. We really didn’t care the date so we let them pick it. January 23rd is my birthday and the day that the doctor’s office just happened to pick. The stars were apparently aligning.

The reality of “we’re having a baby” really hit me during our first ultrasound on Jan. 23rd. Couldn’t really see much, but we could hear a little heartbeat. Since we obviously did not know the sex of the developing baby, I lovingly named it “The blob”. We had plenty of time to decide on a name later. That night Amy threw me a surprise birthday party and “The blob” gave me a birthday card along with everyone else.

At that point, we decided to tell a few friends. When people asked me if I was excited I would reply, “I’m cautiously optimistic.” Which really was the truth because I realized that things don’t always go as we plan. I consider myself a “realist” regarding most things, but I hoped for the best. We decided after the 8 week ultrasound we had scheduled for Feb. 6th, we would start telling more people about our happy secret.

Before our appointment, Amy and I were discussing (arguing) the merits of beginning a college fund. Little did we know that in the next 15 minutes it really wouldn’t matter. February 6th was about to be the most devastating day of my (our) life.

When the lights went off and the ultrasound machine came to life, we were nervously excited. In no time, the ultrasound Technician found our baby and started taking pictures. It was soooo cute. It had morphed from “The blob” to more of a sea monkey, or something. The tech started moving the wand around a lot causing the baby to move in and out of focus. She finally said:

“I don’t hear a heart beat. I’m so sorry guys.”

(Wow this is tough. Amy later told me that she knew before the tech said anything. She didn’t see a heartbeat. I can’t imaging know that before hand, praying that I was wrong.)

I honestly don’t remember much that was said after that in the room. I just remember being a bit weak in the legs, confused and not sure how to comfort Amy. I finally sat down next to Amy and held her hand. We both began to cry. When the tech finished taking the last of the pictures, she lead us to the doctor’s office. We sat there reeling from what just happened. I remember hoping the doctor would come in and tell us it was all a mistake. The equipment was faulty and everything was fine. He did not.

I felt sad, but the feeling I remember feeling the most was anger. I was surprised how angry I was and that my anger wasn’t directed at God or anyone else. It was directed at the situation. I was angry at the fact that we were dealing with a miscarriage after so much waiting, trying, praying, and crying. Amy and I later agreed that everything about it “just plain sucked”.

The doctor walked in the room to talk to us. He held his tablet PC with the pictures and information gathered from the ultrasound. He comforted us as best he could, explaining that the death was nothing we could have prevented or that we could have caused. He said the measurements were just at the 8 week mark meaning that within the last two or three days it passed away. He explained that there are numerous reasons something like this could have occurred, but stressed again that there was nothing we did or did not do that would make a difference.

We then talked about what to do next. Amy and I decided that the best course of action would be to have a D and C as soon as possible. Luckily we were able to get it done immediately the next morning. It was a horrible experience for Amy knowing the baby was forever gone. We used the weekend + a few days to steady ourselves for what lie ahead in the weeks/months/years to come.

I honestly don’t know how we survived it. I remember feeling so helpless, sad, angry, devastated andbroken for weeks after that. It was a one day at a time thing for us. Before this happened, I remember telling a friend that I don’t know what I would do if something bad happened during this pregnancy. Apparently I am surviving. I do remember thinking how lucky we were to have it happen so early instead of months into pregnancy. I also realize that we were lucky for it to have happened right before the ultrasound and not after.

I am having a difficult time finishing this post in a coherent manner so I will end it with a few comments.

1) Do not ask a couple when they are going to start having children. I have no doubt that you are asking in kindness or to start a conversation, but you never know how emotionally loaded that simple question can be. Every time someone asks me that question I am tempted to say, “Well, we have been trying for 3 years now. When we were finally able to conceive, we had a miscarriage that devastated us both. Thanks for asking. I had almost gone a day without thinking about it.” I may have used that line once or twice now. I’m proud to say I watered it down a bit when I did.

2) Do not buy baby items or clothes before the 8 week mark. I am saying this because most miscarriages happen before the 8 week period. Seeing toys, clothes and other baby items lying around will only prolong the healing process.

3) This may seem to go against the previous comment, but flowers, cards, letters and hugs are truly welcomed. For me, these things remindme how love we are by those around us. Chris, my Canadian friend, even hunted down our address and had flowers delivered. I was humbled. Since we got them after the miscarriage, they are less painful to us and will be something we will always cherish. I think the thing that scared us the most was the nagging feeling that we and others would forget about the baby who died. Amy wants nothing more to know the sex of the child so we can at least name it. We got a letter in the mail last week from a family member letting us know we were still being thought about. This kind of thing means so much to us.

4) Do not be afraid to talk. A letter or email is probably best at first. Give the couple a shoulder to cry on if they need it. Perhaps they don’t, but offer to listen.

I am sure there are so many more things I could write. It has been a tough day for Amy and I, but we will survive. Miscarriages almost seem taboo because no one talks about them. When 1 in 5 pregnancies end in a miscarriage, you would think people would talk about them more. I wanted to share my story as a way for me to feel at peace about what happened. But I also want to let those of you who have gone through this know that you are not alone. If you need a shoulder or an ear feel free to email me at ninefingers @ gmail dot com.

Travis Clay

Nothing much I can say except: Watch this movie. If you are interested in a movie based on a real life story of struggling Jews during the German occupation, this one is worth watching. Here is the blurb:

“Based on an extraordinary true story, Defiance is an epic tale of family, honor, vengeance and salvation in World War II. (Paramount Vantage)”

Defiance

Travis Clay

I found this on Gizmodo.com

Travis Clay

Seems that Washington Examiner didn’t get the memo.

CAN WE PLEASE MOVE ON REGARDING RACE IN AMERICA?

By posting this (again), apparently I am still not listening.

Travis Clay

Growing up, I remember helping build and repair wooden things. The problem was that I was not the best hammerer. I would constantly miss or bend nails. Instead of tossing the nail to the side, I would have to hammer it out straight and try again. If we were repairing something and the nail was removed bent, I would have to do the same thing. This was a good example of not being wasteful. Reusing a nail may not have saved us millions of dollars, but it did help. It was something my father was taught. It was something I was taught.

Last night Amy and I went to the Dave Ramsey “Townhall for Hope” at a local church. It was an hour and a half of financial discussion and advice. Dave was able to express his thoughts on why our economy is currently in a recession.

His main point is that the spirit of fear has gripped our country. From Wall Street to Politicians to Media, fear is being pushed to ordinary citizens thus effecting everyone’s outlook on the situation. He pointed out the fact that we are no where close to living in a time similar to the Great Depression. We are also not as bad off as the recessions of 1972 and 1982. But because of the talking heads and the spend happy maniacs on Capital Hill, you would think we were about to crash and burn.

Another point he presented was that gold was not a solid investment. If our currency collapsed today, people would not all of the sudden start trading gold with each other. Instead, they would start bartering and trading goods and services. So think about that before you pick up the phone to order gold.

So don’t fear. It also would not hurt to ask your Congressmen and women to “Stop stimulating STUPID.”

If you do fear, Dave gave 3 points of advice:

1) Get Up and Take Action - “You are the cure, America. No one else is going to solve your problems for you—that’s your job! Find out how you can take control of your money, turn back the fear in your community, and hold your representatives accountable for the decisions they’re making on your behalf. ”

2) Stop Listening to Loser Talk - “We’re sick and tired of the “loser talk” that has permeated the media, the water cooler and the internet. Stop listening to the garbage, and start speaking a word of hope!”

3) Start Giving - “Learning how to give—whether it’s money, time or support—changes your whole mindset. Dave says it pretty clearly: “We can’t win if we can’t give.” If you want to win with money and change the nation, you’ve got to learn how to give again.”

(Thank God for copy and paste!)

I’m convinced that we are going to make it through this. In the end we will be smarter, stronger and more cautious.

If you are interested in watching the event, it will be rebroadcast.

Watch this weekend!

Travis Clay

The following is the prologue to Michael Crichton’s book Jurassic Park:

You think man can destroy the planet? What intoxicating vanity. Let me tell you about our planet. Earth is four-and-a-half-billion-years-old. There’s been life on it for nearly that long, 3.8 billion years. Bacteria first; later the first multicellular life, then the first complex creatures in the sea, on the land.

Then finally the great sweeping ages of animals, the amphibians, the dinosaurs, at last the mammals, each one enduring millions on millions of years, great dynasties of creatures rising, flourishing, dying away — all this against a background of continuous and violent upheaval. Mountain ranges thrust up, eroded away, cometary impacts, volcano eruptions, oceans rising and falling, whole continents moving, an endless, constant, violent change, colliding, buckling to make mountains over millions of years.

Earth has survived everything in its time. It will certainly survive us. If all the nuclear weapons in the world went off at once and all the plants, all the animals died and the earth was sizzling hot for a hundred thousand years, life would survive, somewhere: under the soil, frozen in Arctic ice. Sooner or later, when the planet was no longer inhospitable, life would spread again. The evolutionary process would begin again. It might take a few billion years for life to regain its present variety.

Of course, it would be very different from what it is now, but the earth would survive our folly, only we would not. If the ozone layer gets thinner, ultraviolet radiation sears the earth, so what? Ultraviolet radiation is good for life. It’s powerful energy. It promotes mutation, change. Many forms of life will thrive with more UV radiation. Many others will die out. Do you think this is the first time that’s happened? Think about oxygen. Necessary for life now, but oxygen is actually a metabolic poison, a corrosive glass, like fluorine.

When oxygen was first produced as a waste product by certain plant cells some three billion years ago, it created a crisis for all other life on earth. Those plants were polluting the environment, exhaling a lethal gas. Earth eventually had an atmosphere incompatible with life. Nevertheless, life on earth took care of itself. In the thinking of the human being a hundred years is a long time.

A hundred years ago we didn’t have cars, airplanes, computers or vaccines. It was a whole different world, but to the earth, a hundred years is nothing. A million years is nothing. This planet lives and breathes on a much vaster scale. We can’t imagine its slow and powerful rhythms, and we haven’t got the humility to try. We’ve been residents here for the blink of an eye. If we’re gone tomorrow, the earth will not miss us.